Enhance Your Negotiation Skills By Discovering The One Element That Separates The Men From The Boys In The Negotiation Game

There is 1 central idea, one important factor that is critical to comprehend.

Get this right and you will be compensated with profitable, enjoyable and long lasting business relationships in which price is not the only factor. If you don't have this right, you will battle with sub optimal relationships and you will most likely end up bartering about price in probably all of your negotiations.

The one thing that matters most is comprehending the interests of the other side in your negotiations; this is an important element taught in negotiation training.

Most of us have a good awareness of our own objectives, needs and desires. When we negotiate with others, we usually set about attempting to persuade them to see the world the way that we do. We think to ourselves that because it makes sense to us, surely it must make sense to our counterparts. The problem with this stance is that it completely ignores the objectives, needs and desires of the other side.

What good is it trying to convince another person to do anything that they don't trust would be in line with their objectives, viewpoints and wishes?

You will never persuade anybody to agree with you by arguing with them, quite the contrary will happen. Because you tell someone that they are incorrect and you are the one that is right, you will force them to defend their stance rather than agreeing with you. Nobody likes to be told that they are wrong and if you express to them that they are incorrect it will become key for them to defend their stance because their personal integrity is at risk.

Not often will you achieve consensus with anyone after you have told them that they are wrong, you have also managed to paint yourself into a corner. If it was key for you to reach consensus and you do not manage to win the argument, then you will have to compromise your own integrity by departing from your 'correct' stance to accept the argument of your counterpart.

If you want to reach consensus the easy way rather than have your negotiations escalate into a positional argument, here's what I suggest that you should do:

Start by making some enquiries, the best of which you can ask will be questions designed to show the interests behind the positions that your counterparts have assumed in the negotiation. Open questions are the best kind of questions to show the interest or motivators that reinforce your counterpart's positions.

Here's a great question you can use and simultaneously endorsing your negotiation skills: Why are you negotiating with me / my organisation?

This is very possibly the best question to ask at the start of a negotiation. Follow this question by asking the other side to elaborate on and to prioritise the reasons offered in response to your questions. Then you will have a prioritised list of their most important interests.

Sample Interests:
- Individual: Security, Recognition and Control
- Organisation: Profit, Risk Avoidance and Strategic Fit (Some key factors you would have learned in purchasing training)

Once you have an understanding of your counterparts' key interests it is a good idea to reveal your own interests. Once all the parties to the negotiation have revealed their interests it will be much easier to identify the areas of common ground and then it is useful to present your case in the context of how it would meet their interests. This way, you will not have to persuade your counterpart that your stance is correct; you will only have to show that your suggested course of action would satisfy their interests.

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